Casual Cute FAIL
On an average day, I wake, hang with the kiddo, stay in my drawstring waist pants and tshirt (bra optional) all day, go to bed too late and do it again the next day. Sometimes there is a work out in there too.
I’ve hit the I Don’t Leave the House to Work rut. I have the makeup, some clothes, SHOES. but still.
I leapfrogged my way through a few posts this week and landed on Modern Married Momma. She’s in MY town. She’s HOT. She’s …. she’s GROOMED. FECK.
We make plans to meet for coffee. Thursday at 11.
9 am – wonder if I do some jumping jacks if I can lose 30 pounds in 2 hours.
905 – wonder if I shake my hands a lot if my fingernails will grow out in 1 hour 55 minutes.
910 – go back to playing Mafia Wars.
1000 – stand in closet. start with jeans. Cuz the LB jeans from last week are the only things that fit.
1005 – contemplate dress and flip flops. Nix b/c my toenails look like shit.
1010 – contemplate dressy shirt. decide to not be a douche bag and put on a tshirt instead. Will go well with cute purple shoes.
1015 – do some makeup.
1020 – tone down makeup b/c it’s looking hookerish. Contemplate hair. Decide that I’ll wear sunglasses and shove them in my hair to keep it looking cute.
1030 – throw clothes on toddler.
1035 – email that i’m running a touch late, but on my way.
1035:30 – Uh. Where are mah keys?
1040 – WHERE ARE MAH KEYS?
1045 – laying under truck looking for hideakey. No luck decide I must have left it in truck from the last time I had no key to the truck and wanted to leave the house.
1050 – see tweet from @morgandaycecil telling me she’s chillin with teh coffee and not to worry.
1055 – Alex? WHERE ARE MOMMY’S KEYS!?
1100 – (do not say FUCK to the toddler, do not say FUCK to the toddler)
1100:30 – ALEX WHERE THE FUCK ARE MOMMY’S KEYS?!?!?!?
1100:45 – (oh shit, I said FUCK to the toddler. DAMMIT!)
1110 – back under the truck to search again. cuz the keys are NOT being found. Find key.
1115 – tweet I am out the door.
1116 – feck. no sunglasses in the car. Damn, going to have to go with teh ick hair. Oh well.
On the way there:
tweet: MorganDayCecil Just found new gal pals over at @room704. @missive and #lookingglass femmes to check them out! 
snarky + awesome.
tweet: bellissimatina @MorganDayCecil omg those @room704 girls *are* awesome! Following now! 
tweet: MissIve Oh dear God, I think I just fell in love, after wandering into @room704 SWOON, smart ass girls
tweet: jrporter @MorganDayCecil @MissIve – the @room704 girls rock! There’s more like us! #LookingGlass
Feck it. She and her peeps think me and my peeps are teh fab. Screw the hair.
Coffee was the awesome. Much fun. Except for Alex’s two year old douchbaggery. It’s like he saved it all up. Jackass. He must have hidden his good behavior with my keys.
Now go follow these peeps – they are just like us, but with great hair. There’s even talk of BEWBS! and GROPING!
(As I pulled the truck out of the parking lot, my sunglasses slid out from under the seat. Thanks sunglasses. It was pouring rain and the streetlights were on it was so dark. Big help.)
15 Responses to “Casual Cute FAIL”
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fabulosity..
but why do all you beeshes live soooooo far away???? It makes me really really sad.
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Never have I seen SO MUCH EFFORT put forth just to tell us to follow someone.
Follow Friday, eat your fucking heart out. Room 704 bitches OWN.
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LMAO! I so want to do jumping jacks to see if I can lose 30 pounds now!
Kas
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Wow, 30 pounds in 2 hours? If you ever figure that one out, please let me know. I could totally do Jumping Jacks (or any other workout) for 6 hours and lose all my excess weight! That would be AWESOME!!!!
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So happy that I’m not the only one sticking my sunglasses on my head in hopes of attaining “cute” hair! LOL! This cracked me up!
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Hey!
Hope you don’t mind, I let myself into Room704 (I might, plausibly, be the one who, um, left them in the tub—btw, you may also be out of hot water for like a month or three, and vodka).
Mind if I give you my version of how I got here?
Standing in my bedroom this morning staring at the same 17 loads of unfolded laundry I’ve been staring at for 3 weeks. Doing my obligatory “thinking about domesticity.” Yes, you may be able to lose 30 pounds in two hours, but can you fold laundry with your mind like I can? Yuh huh.
I get a text from @MorganDayCecil that says “Meeting hot blogger for coffee. Check out room704.us.” (Yes, I frequently publish peoples’ texts without permission, so be forewarned, you dirty men.)
And other than the obvious relief that her “command” has “forced” me to abandon my mind-laundry-folding, I think, “Good God, woman, you’re married less than a fortnight and you’re rendezvousing with hot bloggers?!”
Was quite relieved to find it was three hot MAMAS!
Moving quickly through my afternoon whilst tweeting the new mamas about groping and listening the their rawking radio show, I get to the store for more booze around five-ish and, checking my tweets on phone, as I never do *cough*, I see the #snort link and check, solely for my love of the snort (remind me or Morgan to shoot the link of my snort video), only to find that these rawkin’ mamas, or one key-losing-mama, has written about me and my mamas!
Sweetness. Best intro ever. Look forward to getting slapped on the wrist by the cyber standards committee with y’all very soon.
Jen/@MissIve
P.S. (Cuz clearly this comment is not long enough yet) You can see all my girls at http://LookingGlassLane.com , but Morgan prolly told you that. And you should know that we don’t ALL groom. Thinking. Nope. It’s just me that doesn’t. And am now questioning why I would intentionally put myself in proximity with four grooming women, on a regular basis.
Dude, where’s the vodka?
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Wow – wasn’t expecting to be IN a blog post!
So glad to have found you rockin’ ladies (thanks Morgan!). Can’t wait to explore here.
And MissIve isn’t the only Looking Glass girl who isn’t always well groomed, I frequent jeans, t-shirt and flip flops myself
.
Jenn/@jrporter
P.S. I’ve lost my keys more than once too
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OMG… are you shopping in my closet?!
I rock those drawstring pj pants… I wear them out and pretend they are real pants, but I think people know.
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Okay, last minute tweet check while brushing my teeth lead me to here to this amazing post (thank you my dear Jen, @MissIve)
Two- no three- things before I hop into bed with my huzzzzband. (Still getting used calling him that!
He is naked and he is standing right behind me and he is really tapping his foot on the ground HARD to get me to hurry the hell up.
1. The naked man standing behind me actually snorted-LAUGHED-when he read that you called me Groomed. (He knows how often I actually shower).
2. I did notice the purple flats and loved them.
3. Looking Glass Lane/Room704 Block Party MUST happen.
So happy to spread the word about how awesome you and your gals are….my peeps want to get with your peeps and have some drinks.
Time to bed!
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Sigh! I wish you ladies lived on the East coast.
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can i tell you ladies HOW MUCH i needed to read this today? no, probably not. but i will anyway.
hosting a double play date…staring at unfolded laudry, empty frig and a zillion other things that need doing but aren’t half as much fun as reading the antics above… and thinking about how so not martha – so not june i am. i’m pulling out my copy of #Bad Mother for a re-read *smiles*.
But non of this is real. it’s all in my head and i can let it go, love my not-so-martha-mommy-self and laugh and play and remember i have mommy friends like ya’ll that get it about life and love and just being ourselves.
good hair ~ bad hair ~ you all ROCK. As one of the Looking Glass Lane mamas, i’m thinking Room 704 is right up my alley. thanks ladies, for being YOU and sharing YOU with ME!
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Drawstring pants are hot…and “fucking” the firstname of my keys. Blogger meetups are such fun…thanks for the links!
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Can you all leave her alone. SHE’S MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Ah hahah!
Fun times. Sounds like the beginning of a beautiful tribeness.
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SIGH.
Scenes like this don’t happen in Michigan. That’s it. I’m MOVING.
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